Anger sparks bad fights. Bad fights may tear a marriage apart. Bad fights can be fights involving physical abuse, verbal abuse, or silent fights meaning not approaching each other for a period of time.

Learn This

Do not accuse. Do not use the word “you” most of the time during arguments or fights. Focus on using words that express how you feel. Do not criticize your spouse for everything. Examine yourself first for your mistakes.

Do not bring back past issues. Stick to the current issues you want to discuss with your spouse. Ugly past issues will trigger greater tension between a couple. If it is past, let it be. Forgiving is a great way to cherish one another.

Choose the “right” topics. Do not fight over tiny matters. Fighting just because of fighting is harmful over time for a marriage. If you are unhappy about your spouse’s bad habits or weaknesses, let him/her join you in resolving the issues together instead of keeping anger to yourself.

Find a suitable time to fight. Do not raise unhappy issues when your spouse is under work pressure. Do not argue when your spouse is extremely exhausted or tired after a long day of work.

Control your tones and actions. Do not raise your voice easily towards your spouse. Do not start name-calling or fighting in front of your children. These affect your spouse’ emotions and lower his/her selfesteem. Walk away if you must to avoid aggressive fights.

Be flexible to cure fights. Learn from your mistakes. Be able to take in good observations from your spouse. Try to help your spouse in things or events that he/she feels they lack from you. If possible, resolve matters or fights before going to bed.